Short on time this Valentine’s Day? These easy, low-pressure Valentine’s Day ideas are perfect for busy mums who still want to feel the love.
Valentine’s Day rolls around every February 14 and yet, it’s one of those dates that sneaks up in the middle of school lunches, work emails and the constant search for missing socks.
While the entire day can be over-commercialised, it’s still a great excuse to steal a quick kiss or serve as a reminder to organise some special time to pause and connect with your spouse.
How Valentine’s Day began
While the exact origin of Valentine’s Day is somewhat hazy, its roots trace back to ancient Rome, where several legends emerged over time. One story from Valentine’s Day history tells of Saint Valentine, a Roman priest who secretly married couples after Emperor Claudius II banned weddings, intending to keep Roman soldiers single and therefore focused on war.
Another legend claims he wrote a note to his jailer’s daughter signed “From your Valentine”, inspiring generations of love letters. This occurred during a period of intense Roman persecution of religions other than their own, when many Christian martyrs suffered for their faith. Valentine, the Roman priest, became one of them on February 14 for secretly marrying couples and refusing to renounce Christianity.
By the fifth century, the Catholic Church officially recognised February 14 as St Valentine’s Day, replacing an old Roman festival dedicated to the Roman god Lupercus. The Roman feast day that was celebrated by farmers for protection over their sheep and good breeding was turned into St Valentine’s Day.
Over time, especially during the era of courtly love in the Middle Ages and into the 17th century, author Geoffrey Chaucer played a key role in linking love and the celebration of St Valentine’s Day. In his poem Parlement of Foules, he wrote about birds choosing their mates on “seynt valentynes day”, one of the earliest known references connecting romantic love with February 14.
Today, it’s all about red roses, Valentine’s Day cards and chocolates, keeping the spirit of love alive each year.
Valentine’s Day for busy mums: Simple ways to reconnect with your spouse
Let’s be real: Once kids enter the picture, romance often looks less like candlelit dinners and more like collapsing on the couch together once everyone is finally asleep. Valentine’s Day can be that little nudge to reconnect, not in a grand, expensive way, but in a real, everyday, “this is us” kind of way.
Valentine’s Day gifts don’t need to look like a romantic getaway or expensive flowers; it could be a simple takeaway Thai at the park and an ice-cream together.
Here are some fun, low-pressure ideas:
Do a 20-minute at-home date after the kids go down
No babysitter? No problem. Light a candle (even an old one that smells suspiciously like vanilla cupcakes), make two mugs of something warm, and sit together without the phones and TV. Maybe look back at old family photos or even your wedding day pics.
Recreate your first date . . . at home
Did you go out for Thai? Order it in. Did you watch a movie? Stream it. Did you walk along the beach? Play some wave sounds on Spotify. The point is the nostalgia, so try to recreate your first date together. All the better if the kids have a babysitter.
Do a “memory swap”
Take turns sharing three favourite memories from your relationship:
- The funniest thing you’ve ever done together
- A moment they made you feel loved
- A time you were really proud of each other
This one is surprisingly bonding and requires very little preparation.
Write mini love notes
You don’t need fancy Valentine’s Day cards. Grab sticky notes to write tiny messages on and hide them in places they’ll find throughout the day. Ideas include:
- You make the best dinner
- I love how you read to the kids
- You’re my safe place
Sometimes, a little thank-you note and some really specific words of encouragement make the best love letters.
Do a “snack picnic”
Lay a blanket on the lounge room floor, grab whatever snacks you already have (even if it’s just crackers and grapes) and have a mini indoor picnic. Add fairy lights if you want a bit of extra mood lighting.
Exchange small, thoughtful gifts
A romantic holiday doesn’t require big spending. You might choose:
- Their favourite chocolate bar
- A playlist of “your songs”
- A framed photo
- A silly $5 inside-joke item
Thoughtful > expensive every time.
Try the “10-minute touch” challenge
Not as weird as it sounds. Spend 10 minutes doing physical touch that feels connecting: Holding hands, sitting close, hugging. It’s grounding, calming and good for your relationship. 10 minutes too long? Even 60 seconds can make a difference.
If you’re a single mum, Valentine’s Day is still for you
Forget the pressure. Valentine’s Day is at its core about love and you, of all people, show love every single day. This day is just as much yours as anyone’s. Here are beautiful ways to make it meaningful:
Treat yourself like you would treat a friend
If your best friend were having a tough week, what would you do for them? Do that for yourself. Buy flowers. Pick up your favourite snack. Put a sweet note on your bedside table. Make your own version of Valentine’s Day gifts, just for you.
Have a gal-entine’s morning or night
Gather other mums, single or not, for a cuppa, dessert or a casual dinner. Nothing fancy. But laughter and connection are powerful.
Do a self-care hour
Pick something that feels indulgent:
- A long shower with no interruptions
- Reading a book in bed
- A face mask
- Ordering your favourite takeaway
Make it about your kids
Little ones love rituals. You could:
- Make heart-shaped pancakes
- Create DIY greeting cards
- Do a family movie night
- Give them a tiny chocolate heart
- Tell them the sweet version of the Saint Valentine story
It becomes a family tradition that they look forward to each year.
Write yourself a future letter
Be like Saint Valentine by writing a loving note to your future self. Seal it in an envelope to read next February. It’s surprisingly emotional and it’s a fun activity to look back on.
Why celebrating matters (for you and your kids)
However you choose to honour Valentine’s Day, whether partnered or solo, you’re modelling something important for your children:
- That love is worth celebrating
- That connection takes intention
- That self-care is healthy
- That family can include fun in everyday, ordinary activities
And truly? That’s what this whole holiday is about. Not grand gestures, not sitcom-level romance, not Instagram-worthy setups. Just people choosing to pause, notice one another and sprinkle a little extra kindness into their routine.
Whether you’re marking Valentine’s Day with a partner, your kids or just yourself, the heart of the celebration is simple: Love. Your love. Family love. Romantic love. Self-love. All of it matters.
So this February 14, don’t worry about the “perfect” plan. Focus on making memories, slowing down for a moment and creating a special time that feels right for you and yours.
Read next: 10 tips for romance all year long
